peHUB First Read

Cofee* Why private equity returns are misleading

* Fred Destin: The arrogant venture capitalist

* Joshua Brown: The rally apologista’s handbook

* Preqin finds that 60% of private equity firms have either frozen salaries or are considering such a move. Moreover, 14% have cut staffers with another 12% mulling future layoffs.

* Morning Call: U.S. futures signal mixed openEuropean shares extend losses, the Nikkei rally falls short and both China and Hong Kong shares drop on supply woes.

* Get ready for Twoddler (i.e. Twitter for toddlers)

* As the Supremes reconsider SOX, take a listen to the Sarbanes-Oxley Blues.

* Original TARP overseer Neel Kashkari has taken a job with PIMCO. Felix Salmon wonders where else he could have gone.

* Tweet of the Day: @ScottKirsner Is there a corresponding saying, “If you want nothing done, form a committee?”

* Dragon Dictation comes to the iPhone. Yet another reason why my corporate overlords should get over their RIM-colored aversion to letting its reporters use such devices (maybe it’s just time for me to get my own, and accept that it won’t be able to access my biz emails).

* Goldman scored an outsized M&A fee on the HP-3Com deal.

* Peter Fenton of Benchmark Partners, on the relationship between venture capital and open source: